Endometriosis: Or, Why My Uterus Thinks It’s the Main Character
If you had asked me a few years ago what endometriosis was, I would’ve said something like,
“Oh yeah, bad cramps,”
and then confidently moved on with my life.
Now?
Now I would like to formally resign from this experience.
March is Endometriosis Awareness Month, which feels fitting because I am deeply aware. Also, I’m having surgery soon—specifically, a hysterectomy—which is not exactly how I pictured my life going, but here we are.
Let’s Clear Something Up
Endometriosis is not just “bad period cramps.”
It’s more like:
Pain that shows up uninvited and overstays its welcome
Canceling plans you actually wanted to go to
Smiling on the outside while your insides are in chaos
And the tricky part? It doesn’t just sit still. Endometriosis can grow and spread over time. Which means the longer it goes unaddressed, the more complicated things can become.
Fun! Love that for us.
Gaslighting, But Make It Internal
One of the most confusing parts is how easy it is to downplay what you’re feeling. You tell yourself:
Maybe this is normal
Maybe I’m just bad at handling pain
Maybe I just need to push through
Meanwhile your body is like:
“Absolutely not.”
And the reality is—so many of us wait. We wait to bring it up. We wait to get a second opinion. We wait because life is busy… especially when you’re raising a tiny human who needs snacks every 14 minutes.
Motherhood + Endometriosis (A Chaotic Combo)
Doing this while being a mom adds a whole extra layer. Because there’s no such thing as “just rest” when you have a little one.
There’s:
Making meals while trying to ignore pain
Playing, reading, parenting… even on the hard days
Feeling guilty for needing to slow down
And also trying to explain, in a very age-appropriate way, why mommy sometimes just needs to sit for a minute. It’s a constant balance of showing up for your child while also realizing—you have to show up for yourself too.
The Part That’s Hard to Say Out Loud
One of the biggest reasons this decision wasn’t easy?
More kids.
While I am genuinely happy and grateful for the family I have, it still… hurts. Because having a hysterectomy means that choice is being made for me.
And there’s something really complicated about that— grieving a possibility, even if you weren’t 100% sure what you would’ve chosen.
Two things can be true at the same time:
I can feel at peace with one child
And I can feel sadness that the option for more is being taken away because of endometriosis
That part doesn’t get talked about enough either.
Why I’m Having a Hysterectomy
After a lot of back and forth, I’ve made the decision to move forward with a hysterectomy. Not lightly. Not quickly. And definitely not without emotion.
But because I’ve reached the point where managing symptoms isn’t enough anymore. I’m tired of working around it. Tired of wondering how bad a day might be. Tired of giving so much energy to something that shouldn’t control this much of my life.
At some point, it becomes less about “Can I live with this?” and more about “Why should I have to?”
Pre-Surgery Emotions: A Fun Little Spiral
I thought I’d be calm and practical leading up to surgery. Well kind of as I know in reality my blood pressure is raised when I think about scheduling a doctors appointment
Instead, I’m rotating between:
“This is the right decision”
“Wait, is this the right decision?”
Deep cleaning like someone from HGTV is about to judge me
And a quiet hope that this might actually help
Why We Have to Talk About This
We don’t talk about this enough. We normalize pain. We joke about it. We minimize it. And in doing that, we delay getting help.
If I could go back, I would take my symptoms more seriously sooner.
Ask more questions earlier. Push a little harder for answers. Because this isn’t just about discomfort— it’s about your quality of life. Talking about it matters. Seeking help matters. Not brushing it off matters.
Because the longer it’s ignored, the more it can take from you—your time, your energy, your options.
If You’re Sitting There Wondering…
If you’re reading this and thinking, “Okay but maybe mine isn’t that bad…” You don’t have to wait until it’s unbearable. You don’t need to hit a breaking point to deserve care. And you don’t have to prove anything to anyone—especially not your own body.
Things I’m Learning (Against My Will)
Rest is not optional
Your body will escalate if you ignore it long enough
Being “tough” is overrated
Asking for help is necessary (even when you hate it)
So this month, I’m talking about endometriosis. Because it matters. Because it’s real. And because more of us are dealing with this than we probably realize.
If sharing this helps even one person speak up sooner or feel less alone—it’s worth it.
And for me?
I’m heading into this next chapter hoping for less pain, more presence with my family, and significantly less main character energy from my uterus. At minimum, I’d just like to parent without factoring in whether my body is going to betray me that day. That feels like a reasonable goal.